Life has taken a hard right turn. In the last two months, I went from working part time at home to working full time downtown. We went from living in a semi-rural cottage to a 5th floor modern apartment building on a noisy street with a view of downtown. Life is radically different, like a mirror-image of itself. It all happened so quickly, that I feel like I woke up from one dream into another.
I wasn’t particularly looking to start a full-time job. My plan was to ramp up to working full time in September when Melody started Kindergarten, and have one last summer out in Seattle’s parks with small children. I wasn’t really looking, but it was looking for me and it was too good to pass up. I couldn’t have imagined that I could have found a position more suitable to my skills, at an excellent company that is growing like gangbusters and reeking of opportunity. The benefits and pay are ideal and they actually encourage and foster work-life balance. Jackpot. They have an office in Costa Rica, and are sending me there to work next week. Mega-millions Jackpot.
At the same time I was interviewing for the job, I was shopping for a six month lease on a two bedroom, two bathroom rental. I had hit my breaking point on living in our tiny house with a postage stamp bathroom, where it seemed like everything was in decay and we couldn’t fix anything, because it was all going to get demolished anyhow. Moving was cathartic. Everything had been in the same spot for the last seven years, and as we dismantled our lives the stuck energy and the dust bunnies escaped. We moved into a brand spanking new space the day before I started my job.
Yet, it’s not all coming up cupcakes. Some of side-effects of these decisions have been hard to swallow. I felt like I was letting my old boss down, and because he was a friend before being a boss, I felt disloyal. Leaving Melody in the care of a string of sitters, hurriedly hired to take my place as afternoon nanny was traumatic for both of us. It was a scheduling nightmare, and there were days that I had to step out of meetings to deal with sitters that were late or in the wrong place at the wrong time. The worst of it all is that, the reason we moved out – to start construction, after a month and a half, still has not begun. (More on that some other day). I have stopped writing regularly. No excuses for that, it just is. And it sucks.
Today is my birthday. I chose to take a day off work to structure my day however I want and have stretches of time where I have my thoughts entirely to myself. I made a vow to myself to not open email, and I made arrangements to be truly OOO, so my mind would be free to be creative and not get mired in problem-solving. After a year and a half of this being the norm, then ending suddenly, this moment feels truly precious. One of the many things I chose to do today was write. I couldn’t wait to start share this new chapter and settle back into my Harmonious Mess – my blog and my life.